Flying squirrels and giant lizards

I had quite the chuckle the other day. Oreo and I were hanging out in the dry lot, enjoying some hay and having a chat—you know, like horses do.

“I think I am retired now like you,” Oreo said.

I just looked at him. “ Why do you think that? How old are you?”

“Nine,” he answered.

“Are you lame?” I asked him.

“Not that I know of,” he said.

“Then what makes you think you are retired?”

“Well, I haven’t been ridden in days and days and I didn’t have to go to that other farm, you know, where it’s warm and the flying squirrel lives,” he explained.

“Flying squirrel? What in the world are you talking about?”

“Weren’t you ever there?” Oreo said, looking perplexed.

“Uh, no. I have never been to a place with squirrels that fly,” I assured him.

“Well, let me tell you, this one did. Fly, I mean. Yes, he did. And you never knew when he would show up either, so you always had to be on the alert.”

He paused, looking a little wild-eyed. I could tell he wasn’t making this up.

“Go on,” I said.

“Like I was saying, it was in the warm place with the giant lizards and—”

“For goodness’ sake,” I interrupted. “Flying squirrels and giant lizards?” Now I really was intrigued and basically glad I had not ever been there.

“Well yeah, and huge white birds with really long legs,” he added.

“Okay, okay, that’s enough. Tell me about this flying squirrel.”

So he launched into a story about how a crazy squirrel would climb up the tree next to the dressage ring and get drunk on some kind of fruit and then fly out of the tree right into the ring.

“I would be going along, trying to do what my mom was asking and then out of nowhere this squirrel would come flying out of the tree, land in the arena and run off! The humans thought it was the funniest thing they ever saw but we horses were a little unnerved by it.”

“I should say,” I responded. “I think that would have given me a heart attack. But wait, what does that have to do with you thinking you are retired?”

“Oh yeah, I got sidetracked. Well, it just makes sense. I’m not being ridden and I didn’t go to the warm place, so I must be retired,” he said with finality.

I sighed and shook my head. “Kid, I got news for you. You are too young and too sound to be retired. You must be on a break.”

“A break?”

“Yeah,” I said. “A winter break. Don’t worry. As soon as it gets warmer in Kentucky your mom will be back riding you every day. My advice to you is, enjoy the time off while you can!”

Imagine thinking he was retired and telling wild stories about flying squirrels to boot. He just has too much time on his hands. I laughed to myself.

I hope spring comes soon for his sake!

Until my next adventure – Taco!